20 Mentor Training Modules 4: Starting and Leading Conversations
20 Mentor Training Modules 4: Starting and Leading Conversations
Hey everyone, welcome back to the mentor training modules. This time around we will be discussing starting and leading conversations. Just a quick note, this module is best run synchronously so that mentors can practice starting and leading conversations.
The best way to start conversations is none other than icebreakers! They are a great way to improve group dynamics from the beginning. Imagine being in a group where everyone feels awkward talking to each other versus a group where everyone is excited for meetings and doing group work because the group just communicates well. The second scenario sounds a lot more fun, so that is something ice breakers can push you towards. Encouraging students to break out of their comfort zone, at least communication wise, will help them bond and work better together in the future. Take it from a physics perspective. One of Newton’s three laws is inertia. A body of mass at rest takes an external force to move. In an ideal world, that body of mass will continue moving until there is an equal and opposite external force. Take the icebreakers as a way to alleviate stress and provide your groups the external force they need to get going and gain traction and trust amongst each other as a group.
If icebreakers aren’t the right fit, here is an accepted way to professionally start a conversation. Start with a greeting. A simple “hey!” or “hello!” is great! Notice how I am starting off with a higher tone so the other feels welcome to the conversation and can clearly see that you are trying to make the effort to have a conversation with them. Next, follow up with something pleasant like a compliment or something warm, again, to welcome others to the conversation. Finally, introduce yourself and your role.
If you anticipate a conversation to be difficult, we have a few different tricks to get your started. First of all, choose the right time and setting. Make sure you get the individual at a good time and make sure they are not occupied with anything else at the time. Next, be respectful. Just because it is a difficult conversation, that does not mean you need to be rude. There is always a way to be kind, just do your part to practice saying your points and finding that kindness. Next, be open minded and make sure you’re willing to listen to the others in the conversation. This will make sure there are no confusions and make sure everyone feels heard, especially during in a tense environment. To recall our conversation about accountability, if you have been keeping track of project expectations and if you have been defining each group members role throughout the process, even difficult conversations should not be coming as a surprise. Rely on the evidence you have to explain your reasoning. If it feels like the conversation could become hostile, ask a second staff member to attend the meeting to ensure that you have someone from the team there as help keep