grep -f alternative for huge files

grep -F -f file1  file2

file1 is 90 Mb (2.5 million lines, one word per line)

file2 is 45 Gb

That command doesn't actually produce anything whatsoever, no matter how long I leave it running. Clearly, this is beyond grep's scope.

It seems grep can't handle that many queries from the -f option. However, the following command does produce the desired result:

head file1  >  file3
grep -F -f file3   file2

I have doubts about whether sed or awk would be appropriate alternatives either, given the file sizes.

I am at a loss for alternatives... please help. Is it worth it to learn some sql commands? Is it easy? Can anyone point me in the right direction?